Being a migrant and being active in the society around you should not be something surprising or worth admiration. In reality, sometimes you become a hero because of it, and sometimes you become a “punching bag” for people who take out their own frustration on you. These are, of course, two extremes, while the middle ground should be something to aim for.
I have personally always been active: doing voluntary activities since my 14, writing for the local newspaper since my 17, helping my mom in their aerobic sport club when needed, doing cleanings with the neighbours on our street…
My activism stopped for a while when we moved to Finland. I felt too visible for being different. I could not communicate in the same language, which made the participation problematic. I was also not confident in approaching people, as they did not really have the vibe of accessibility around them. Slowly, but steadily, I found my way back.
It started with volunteering in some NGOs when my Finnish was still very basic and ended with me taking care of my son’s football team in the role of “ikäluokkavastaava” (it is the person who does not coach, but does all the communication and organisational duties around).
Between the beginnings and the current situation, I was taking care of my daughter’s basketball team, baking cookies for kids’ classrooms’ fundraising, going to every parents’ meeting, either in schools or hobby activities, and I was just present in the spaces. As we live in a small town, for many, it was their first encounter with a migrant person in Finland. While sometimes I was very kindly and naturally included, sometimes it was the other way round.
I realised why so few people of migrant backgrounds participate outside of their cultural or international circles. Because the majority is holding the fort. They can either help you or make it impossible for you. And most of them do nothing much, because they either do not know what to do, or they do not care, or mostly they do not want to come out of their own comfort zone.
If you want to participate as a migrant, you are out of your comfort zone constantly. You say one sentence, and everyone knows that you are not local. Being outside of the comfort zone is difficult. It is stressful, and it is absolutely normal to evaluate it as not worth it.
Some people are nervous about your Finnish skills. They do not make any effort to understand you, but rather not to approach you in the future, because it is outside of their comfort zone and they evaluate it as not worthy.
Some people prefer that migrants stay invisible and quiet. If they must be here, better if they are stuck in their circles and do not bother the rest of society. Being vocal and sometimes critical is not going to earn you many supporters when you are a migrant. While it is a normal thing to gossip behind people’s backs in Finland too, people are not so open when more critical feedback should be given. Because it is out of their comfort zone. And when you do it as a migrant, the Finnish people would rather look the other way, because any sort of confrontation is out of their comfort zone. If you are kind and do not have many opinions, you have a higher chance of being included.
If you are visibly Muslim or a person of colour, you most likely will not be included, and you will have to invest much more effort to participate. At the end, you might evaluate it as not worth it, because the minority stress is just too much to handle.
As a person in charge of the football team, one of my tasks is to tell parents when they are late with the payments. While many people react normally, apologise and pay their invoices, some will scream at you, that some fuc**** migrant will not be telling them what to do. So you might again reconsider, is this worth it? Because as a visible, active and in-charge migrant, you are constantly out of your comfort zone.
Being out of your comfort zone often, permanently, or constantly is not something that many can handle. It impacts your well-being, your self-perception, and the feeling of safety.
Next time, you might rather not participate, because you can’t continue any more. And when you stop, it will be the victory for those who, anyway, wish you were not here in the first place. Unless someone steps in and supports you, the participation can still feel very very lonely.
What is the lesson here? We, migrants, need allies among you. We need people who are not afraid to step outside of their comfort zone occasionally, as we do regularly. We need someone who does not turn their head away when something must be said and done. Migrant participation can only go as far as the host society genuinely supports us to go.
Next time, when you ask why migrants are not active, present in the spaces and participating, you can ask yourself what you have done to make it possible…
