Ten years have passed since we moved to Finland. The best measure of time is to look at our younger one, who was not even five months old during his first trip to Helsinki. He has grown up here, from a baby into a pre-teenager. Ten years is also a milestone that calls for looking back and taking stock.
It is a cliché to say that many things have changed in ten years. And yet, it is true. We have changed, our circumstances have changed, and our surroundings are different as well. Evaluating ten years of life must start with a personal statement, so here is mine: the good thing is that life eventually gets easier, and you adjust to the new circumstances. The feeling of isolation, sadness, and some sort of fear of the unknown that I felt during the first year or two does not last forever. I eventually found my bunch, and having someone to visit and have coffee with helped a lot with my own well-being. On the other hand, I know that I would prefer not to feel the same way again anytime soon.
My employment situation is still tricky. I have been employed for more than 4.5 years now, but I still do not feel safe when thinking about the future. My project and contract will be over in about six months, and the situation in the labour market, especially in my line of work, does not look promising. Overall, I see positive changes – more internationals are getting hired, even if their Finnish language skills are imperfect. But I also acknowledge that there is still a lot of bias and discrimination in hiring.
Finnish language skills deserve special attention. For sure, I expected that after ten years in Finland, I would speak better Finnish than I actually do. I am kind of fine with it – I can manage my everyday life in Finnish, and there is no problem there. I have no problem reading magazines or even books in Finnish, although it takes much longer than reading in any other language I know. Working in Finnish is different. I miss the fluency and the ability to really say what I want to say without first thinking about whether I can even express it properly. I do not use Finnish daily, and I should probably go back to some of the grammar that I did not really learn in language school when I was overwhelmed by many other things.
On the other hand, my husband does not speak Finnish at all. But please, do not judge him. He has been employed since day one in Finland, and tell me honestly: how many of you have the energy to attend a foreign-language course after you are done with work? I am not happy about it, as it means that I have to take care of most of the things related to the kids’ schools, health, hobbies, and friends. Unfortunately, given his circumstances, he is not able to study the language. However, I think the employer should have done more to support its international employees. Language courses during working hours come to mind as something that could be quite easily arranged.
At the beginning of our expat journey, I had to come out of my comfort zone very often. I had to ask strangers for advice almost daily. I had to approach strangers to find out if we could eventually become friends. I had to speak broken Finnish when I wanted to sort things out with the authorities. Now I feel calmer, more confident, and more at home.
For the first time, during this summer holiday, when I was asked where we are from, I answered: “From Finland.” Many times before, I would naturally have answered that we are from Slovakia. But nowadays, I feel that we are actually much more from Finland. Our kids have spent their whole lives in Finland, and I have a feeling that, despite everything, this is becoming my home. Maybe the fact that I now also have Finnish citizenship gives me the confidence to feel that I am Finnish too.
In the last ten years, we have also witnessed many big societal changes in Finland, which must also be difficult for citizens to take in. The war in Ukraine, which led to the closure of the eastern border. Finland joining NATO. Finland shrinking the welfare state. Finland drastically changing its migration policy. And, of course, the highest unemployment rate in Europe.
Even though we are becoming more at home here, we also see that the country is not prospering, and although our personal situation is better, the circumstances are, honestly, worse. How these changes will influence families like ours in the future is difficult to predict.
Concluding my imperfect evaluation of our tenth anniversary in Finland, I must admit that I would not be who I am without this experience. We did not get divorced when the toll of migration on our marriage was at its highest, and we have made it this far. The kids are doing great in school and have socialised without any problems. We have a good, ordinary life here, so I guess we kind of made it.
Let’s see what I will say after another ten years 🙂
